I Will Rejoice

     I'm sitting here toggling back and forth between websites applying for jobs and trying not to be discouraged with the caliber of jobs that are offered.  I find it difficult to find a job when all the stuff I am qualified on, I have difficulty performing due to back injury.  I have applied for 4 or 5 more jobs today that I pray will eventually come to fruition.

      I sometimes just want to give up looking, but realize this is the wrong approach.  Most people who know me don't peg me as a quitter, and I don't see myself that way either.  However, sometimes the devil gets a hold of just the slightest negative thought and seems to press right where it hurts.  Seems I find myself looking for comfort more and more from the Bible as of late.  Right now that seems to be the only constant non-disappointing thing in my life.  People will disappoint and circumstances will disappoint, but the Lord never disappoints.  He may not always give us what we desire, but He always gives us what we need.

     I find that even when I feel like plummeting to the depths of despair, the Lord always provides a life line to pull me out.  He brings me out of the darkness and carries me safely to the warmth of His glory.  Now I understand how it is possible to look at people and wonder how they can appear to be in such dire straits but have such a wonderful and positive outlook on life.  It's because the Lord is their beacon in the storm guiding them through the port. Even with all of the disappointments life seems to throw our way, there is a constant ringing in my ears and it is saying "I will rejoice, I will rejoice, and be glad."  That song has been stuck in my head all week.  I downloaded it yesterday and have probably listened to it 20 times. 

     There is something to be said for music, how it can totally change our whole demeanor.  The more negative music we listen to the more negative we are and vice versa with the positive music.  So even though I may find disappointment in the ways of the world, I will never find disappointment from the Lord and will take this opportunity to Love Him, Study Him, and attempt to Learn and Decipher the message He has given me. I will continue to rejoice in Him and be thankful for all of the glorious things that He has provided for me. Have you taken the opportunity to thank Him lately for all the wonders in your life?

I Will Rejoice

Verse 1

There is a river whose streams make glad the city of our God.

There is a river whose streams make glad the city of our God.

So I will rejoice, I will rejoice, and be glad.

My depressed days are over, I will, I made up my mind, I will, I'm gonna be glad.

Verse 2

There is a fountain full of grace that flows from Emmanuel's veins.

There is a fountain so full of grace that flows from my Savior's veins.

It came and it healed me

It came and refreshed me

It came and washed my sins away!

Chorus

So I will rejoice, I will rejoice, and be glad.

I will rejoice, I will rejoice, and be glad.

Deeper Still.....

     Struggles.  We all have them, but of course, nobody wants them.  No matter what, we all seem to go through difficult times in our lives constantly looking for an answer as to why things are the way they are. These struggles undoubtedly affect our personal lives as well.  Sometimes we will lash out at others for no apparent reason, constantly bickering just to hear our own voices. This somehow proves that we are still alive because we can hear our own voices.  We get so muddled down in our struggles and neglect to see the harm that we are causing to the relationships around us.  Of course, no one can understand our struggles, and everything is ALWAYS someone else's fault. 

     WE never act snotty, better than others, correct in every situation (even when we are proven wrong), argumentative (always having to get the last word in) or just down right mean.  No this could never describe us.  It's always everyone else's fault and we are PERFECT.  We all know people like this in our lives, and chances are, on some days, that person looks back at us from the mirror.  We try to live morally just, and somehow certain people get under our skin and we just don't understand it.  The misery ensues and we start blaming them.  A lot of times, the problem is really us.  Maybe we are not really as patient as we thought we were.  Have you ever noticed how it is easier to forgive friends and strangers before you can do that with your own family?  Somehow it's as though we hold our family to a higher standard and somehow constantly keep getting disappointed.  I know that there are times when I do as I'm sure they feel the same way about me sometimes.  Unfortunately it gets to the point where you can be living in the same house with someone, and not really know each other at all.

      We all feel at times that our family doesn't really understand us and when we need to talk we end up seeking outside counsel.  This isn't necessarily a bad thing, we all need counsel from time to time and I find it so much more beneficial when it is a spiritual counsel.  Because at least that way, I know that the guidance I'm receiving is correct and to my benefit and in line with the Lords will.  Family doesn't always give you ideas that really benefit you in the ways of the Lord, but more in ways that you can help them.  Now don't get me wrong, if that's the Lord's will, then so be it.  However, we can't keep making decisions in our lives based off of people who really have no say so in our lives.  We need to make those decisions based off of the Holy Spirit's direction and not anyone else's including our own.  I believe part of this direction will be for us to step back and take a look at ourselves and uncover the fallacies in our own lives that cause us to have dysfunctional relationships with loved ones and try and work on that.  By correcting our own misgivings, we can go on to repair and renew our relationship not only with our family but also with the Lord.  Because if you really think about it, are we really living the life the Lord wants us to if we are not living Christian values within our own families?

     We may appear to live this way with the people in our community, but not necessarily in our own homes.  Until we can learn this, we can never really get closer in our daily walk with the Lord.  Until we get our lives completely in order, the Lord will continue to throw up road blocks hoping that eventually we will get the message and finally succumb to Him.  This realization has come to me recently and I understand we all need work in this area, including myself.  I have never professed to be perfect in any way, shape, or form. I do however try to live a God driven life. Unfortunately, I am human and am still trying to learn the lessons of patience and understanding with my family.  Hopefully they will do the same and as we work on these issues separate and together, we all can go deeper still in our relationship with the Lord.

Bless Me Indeed

     The deep dark recesses of the mind can be a scary place. Seems we often travel there when life seems difficult. The farther we travel down that path the darker things become. It’s almost as if the cold darkness becomes all-encompassing inviting us into the inner sanctum. Sometimes we fall so far into the darkness that we can’t make out the constant light providing the path out. Sometimes we don’t even know what happened that pulled us down so far into the bowels of despair. The sad thing is it doesn’t really have to be much for the devil to find a way in. Once he’s got you in the cross hairs, it becomes easier and easier to pull you out of the light.

     There will be days where the crying is the least of our concern. We feel the life being sucked out of us and feel powerless to prevent it. Luckily God sends little angels to do His bidding. It seems like sometimes our lives are in such disarray and then along comes someone who shakes up our world. It’s like our life is an etch and sketch, they take it, shake it, and the pain and misery slowly dissipate. It’s like we have been living in a fog and don’t understand why. Seems even when the devil has a hold of us, God sends an unlikely angel to pull us out of the pit and defeat the enemy. Regardless of the situation in your life that has you inviting the cold and dark into your life, if you stand fast, stand strong, the warm light of the Lord will pull you from the despair, the anguish, the agony, the misery, and the pain of the situation.

     We all go through these situations whether we are Christians or not. Fortunately there are some of us more prepared than others. Many times in the last few weeks I have invited the darkness in feeling boxed in by the trials and tribulations of the obstacles in my life right now. I was recently reminded of the prayer of Jabez which says “Bless me indeed, enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, keep me from evil that I may not cause pain.” 1 Chronicles 4:10. I’ve had to repeat this to myself at least 5 times a day the last few days.

     Although I am not directly where I would like to be in life at this particular moment, I am where God needs me to be. I don’t understand it and even have become frustrated at times. Through the tears and the adversity He is teaching me patience. I am resolved to be still and know that He is God and know that He has a plan for me in the Body of Christ. It may be a while for me to know what the plan is, but I will continue to talk to Him, listen to Him, Love Him and pray to Him no matter what. In the meantime, I am thankful for the little angels that He sends my way to help me decipher the message, because without them I would be just another pawn in the devil’s game of chess.